Overheard at Borders

Before I go to bed at far too late of an hour for any living organism, I just wanted to discuss a rather strange incident that happened while I was at Borders tonight. I was in the art and design section, minding my own business, when from the middle of the store I heard some of the most God-awful cacophonous laughter I have ever heard in my life. I had no clue what in the hey-hi-howdy-ho was going on, so I more-or-less discreetly observed what was happening from my section.

Winter in New York

Old Man Winter, unfortunately, is upon us, and while I know that at least four of you live in the nice and roasty-toasty warm South (relatively speaking, anyway), the season is bearing down on us here in the Northeast already, just like a fat lady who accidentally sat on a Pomeranian. Already we’ve had something like thirty-eight feet of snow. I mean, I live on the fifth floor of a building. I shouldn’t be able to open my window and jump out and land only a few inches below my windowsill into an icy pile of snow and slide all the way down to ground level, but I practically can.

BID-ding on 86th Street

It’s interesting living in what is, essentially, a shopping district. I live on 86th Street in Brooklyn on a block of the 86th Street B.I.D. A “B.I.D.,” for those of you who don’t know, is a “business improvement district.” This name implies that somewhere there’s some agency or something that would try and improve business on 86th Street, but as far as I can tell, the only thing they do is provide the guys who empty the garbage along the street with coveralls that say “86th Street.”

Laffy Taffy

My, how the times have changed. I can remember Laffy Taffy from when I was little, and I specifically remember that the wrappers included riddles to keep you occupied while you tried to gnaw through this particularly sticky and viscous mess of candy.

Well, I discovered today that Laffy Taffy is in fact still made, but it’s not really “taffy” anymore, as it’s now sort of a soft, enlarged version of a Starburst but with more of a plasticene flavor. And the riddles that at some point used to bear at least a minor semblance to something entertaining have become pathetically bad.